


My Match? Please.

by 2edge4u



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, Save Carmilla, please, post season zero
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-18
Updated: 2015-12-19
Packaged: 2018-05-07 12:30:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5456588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/2edge4u/pseuds/2edge4u
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What should have totally happened after the tapes ended in season zero. The silence about a potential season 3 is killing me so here's this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

“Wait a minute...” Laura says, her eyebrows scrunched together.

“What?”

“The fairy queen thinks I’m annoying?!”

“What on earth makes you think she was talking about you?” you ask, knowing the answer all along.

“Oh, come on. You know why.”

“Well, if she were talking about you then I think you know why. Just think back to when we first met. You spent all your time playing Lauronica Mars, endlessly questioning my cleanliness which isn’t that bad by the way and literally tied me to a chair and starved me for days on end.”

“I am not annoying and I am definitely not shrill.”

“I know that, _now_.”

“Wait, do you mean that you thought I was annoying too? Ouch.”

“Cupcake, listen to me. Yes, there may have been a short time where I thought of you as annoying but”

Laura scoffs and folds her arms, turning away from you slightly. You grab her arm lightly, pulling her back toward you. You look into her eyes before continuing.

“I never thought I would see the end of your ridiculous investigative games and ridiculous rules, but everything changed. The day you told me that you thought I deserved better was the first time I had woken up from my nightmare in more than a century. No one had ever cared about my well-being before. Suddenly all your annoying habits became actually kind of endearing. Before all that I may have thought you were cute which would have made it easier to do my job so to speak, but after it was like I saw you in an entirely new light. You had this kind of honest, unadulterated beauty that I had never seen in another person, not even Ell. I knew I had to get closer to you, and so I did.”

“So that whole thing about being your match?”

“Yes, of course you are. It’s not even a question to me anymore.”

“But so much has happened and I can’t”

“Why? Why does it have to be like this? Why can’t we just be who we were obviously destined from the beginning to be? Look, I know that I am so far from being perfect but aren’t we all? I’ve never tried to downplay who I am. I told you about my past, the despicable things I’ve done and you still chose me. Why do things have to change? I mean, if you can’t imagine ever lovi- I mean being with me again then I will understand. I will never be able to move on but I will understand and respect your decision.”

She doesn’t say anything and you can’t help but feel frightened. If your heart were still beating, it would be pounding out of your chest. She looks away from you, pulls her knees up to her chest and holds onto them for dear life. A few tense moments pass and for the first time in a while you can’t read what she’s thinking. You suddenly want to run away because you just can’t take the pain of her deciding to end it for good, but alas you’re stuck in this labyrinth of a library and you have nowhere to run to.  

She takes a deep, shaky breath and exhales slowly before turning to you.  She’s crying and you can’t help but feel heartbroken since you know she’s crying because of you. You never wanted to hurt her. Laura is everything to you. Tentatively you reach up to wipe away a single tear with your thumb but she leans into your hand, letting out a sob when your skin touches hers.

“Laura,” you whisper.

She’s crying harder now and you pull her into your lap, holding her as her body trembles. You feel the back of your throat starting to tighten and your eyes are burning. The last thing you want to do is cry but the one you love is falling apart in your arms and you don’t have much control over your emotions at the moment. You sniffle silently, trying to keep up the appearance of being strong but you know that you’ve failed.

You stay there, holding her tightly for what seems like an eternity. You almost don’t want to let go because you’re terrified of what she’ll say when she’s able to. Is she going to tell you that she’s done? That too much has happened for you to ever regain what you once had? Even the possibility of that happening sends a bolt of fear through your body that shakes you to the core. You can’t lose her. You just can’t.

After another few minutes, you hear her sobbing begin to subside and feel her beginning to stir. You know this conversation is coming and even though you kind of started it you are in no way ready for her answer.

She finally sits up, pulling her eyes up to meet yours and the pain hidden deep within them is enough to break you. The fact that you caused such intense pain for the one person you love more than anyone is by far the worst thing you have ever done in your centuries on this god forsaken earth.

“Carm,” she says, barely holding back more tears like a dam on the brink of disaster.

You reach your hand up, brushing her hair behind her ears and wiping her tears. You just want to take everything back. You want to go back to that night when she decided to first take on your mother. You wish you had paid more attention so you could have stopped her. Yes, she may have been on a mission, but she obviously cared about you then, right? She might have listened to you. You could have taken her away from all this and avoided all the pain and anguish that fills her heart now.

“Yea?”

“That’s the problem, I will always choose you. No matter what seems to happen, I will always choose you. A good person would have done the right thing and saved Silas, and really the world. Now your mother, Perry, whoever she may be is out there planning her next move because I just couldn’t let you die! I fought so long and so hard to defeat her and Vordenberg but I was wrong about everything like usual. I don’t know why I ever tried because not only did I not stop them, but I’m pretty sure I made everything worse.”

She’s fighting back tears again and while you can’t help but feel a bit relieved you still hurt for her.

“Laura, what on earth makes you think you’re not a good person? You’re the greatest person I’ve ever known.”

“Because! I chose love over everything else!” she yells and grabs my hands, stopping them from stroking her hair lightly.

“I need you to really listen to me when I say this. I don’t know why you feel like it is solely your responsibility to save the world, but it’s not. There is always going to be evil out there, trying its hardest to erase anything good because that’s what evil does. I’m sorry that you had to see that first hand with this whole Silas thing, but the fact is that the battle of good and evil has always been and always will be. There is no magic spell or knight in shining armor that can defeat it completely.”

“Wow, you really know how to make a girl feel better,” she says.

“Hold on, I’m not finished. What you’ve done is the most noble thing I’ve ever seen. No offense, but in comparison to my mother, you are just an annoying, shrill of a girl.”

She gasps in shock, but you reach up to cup her face in your hands and she relaxes slightly so you can continue.

“But none of that even came close to stopping you. My mother is one of the most powerful beings I have ever come across, and you, a nineteen year old who knows nothing about the world we live in took on the responsibility of vanquishing her and anyone else who tried to stop you from saving Silas. Do you have any idea how brave you are? I have spent the majority of my life trying to run away from my mother because it was easier and you just ran at her head on, knowing all the while it could kill you.”

“But you took her on too,” she says.

“I only did that for you. How can you still not know that?” you ask.

“Because after everything I’ve done, I’m not worth saving.”

“Don’t you dare even save that. I have waited more than three centuries for you, laid in a coffin filled with blood for decades seeing no end to my misery all because I was waiting for you. Of course you’re worth saving because you’re the one who saved me. You’re worth saving because you might be the last pure, good thing left in this world. Yes, you chose me once but that doesn’t make you evil in any way. I hate to tell you but all the good you’ve done doesn’t even make a dent in the evil that is still thriving in the underworld, waiting for its moment to break free. You have the right to be happy because you may only have a few decades in the grand scheme of eternity and you shouldn’t have to spend every waking minute of it fighting for everyone else but yourself. This is your life, Laura and you live it the way you want to, not the way you feel like you have to.”

She’s looking at you like you just unlocked the chains she put around her heart. You’ll never know why she decided to take on the world, but even the thought of her finally letting go and living for herself, for you, is enough to give you hope. You’re waiting desperately for her to say something, anything to break this palpable silence when the unthinkable happens.

She leans forward, crashing her lips into yours and you feel everything inside you break apart. You’ve been waiting for this moment for ages but it’s still such a surprise it takes a moment for you to respond. After the shock wears off, you fist your fingers into her hair and pull her closer. She’s kissing you so desperately, sighing and whining into your mouth as your tongues tangle and your teeth crash together as if she’s making up for all the time that was lost.

You run your hands down her sides, pulling her by her hips onto your lap and as close to you as you can. It has been far too long since you felt Laura’s body against yours and tears begin to fall when she relaxes into you. She’s holding both sides of your face firmly, kissing you with such intent that you can feel the love pouring out of her. You don’t know if she is just letting go of her emotion or if this is a declaration of sorts, but you’re in no way ready to stop.

Your hands are roaming, trying to follow the path you memorized all that time ago when she suddenly breaks from you and pulls back in a gasp for air.

“I’m sorry. What’s wrong?” you ask, probably looking scared to death.

“Nothing’s wrong. I just want to make sure I remember every detail. I finally feel free from everything. Free from your mother, free from Vordenberg, and free from the burden of saving everyone. I know this probably isn’t over, that your mother is probably up there planning her next move and assembling her undead army, but I just don’t care anymore. You set me free, Carm. Our love set us free from it all.”

“You mean?”

“Yes, I love you. I always have,” she admits and leans back in to kiss you softly.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” you ask.

“I guess because I thought it would make me weak, but I already was. I was weak for you but I couldn’t admit it to myself or anyone else.”

“I love you too, Laura. I have been in love with no one, and never shall unless it should be with you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come back for the sex. They're gonna do it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They're gonna bang.

She’s looking at you, a mess of ragged breaths and tousled hair and she has never looked more beautiful. You smile slightly because you just can’t believe this is real. Not too long ago you were convinced she hated you and there was no hope in sight, but here she is straddling your lap and telling you she loves you. She smiles back and you suddenly remember how long it’s been since you’ve seen her smile. You let your mind wander into the past for just a moment and it fractures your very being, remembering a time when her smiles her caused by anyone but you.

She must have noticed your drifting mind because suddenly her hands are softly brushing the hair that’s fallen free behind your ears, pulling you back to her with ease.

“What is it?” she asked.

“I just, I’m just so”

“I know. Me too.”

She pulls you up into a kiss, one that in just a moment seems to heal every part of you that’s been broken since you walked out that door. You wrap your arms around her, pulling her as close to you as you can but it will never be enough. Your hands slide under the back of her shirt instinctively, almost as if no time has passed. She jumps slightly at the cold touch of your hands, but quickly relaxes and rolls her hips into you. You’ve been waiting for this moment for so long it almost doesn’t feel real. For a while there you thought she was gone forever, so you want to make sure you don’t lose her again.

Her kisses are messy, frantic even. It’s almost as if she thinks you’re going to disappear if she lets go for even a second. You take hold of her, cupping her jaw lightly as you try to slow things down and she follows your lead willingly. She starts to shrug your jacket off your shoulders and you let her. You break from her lips in favor of kissing her neck and she stretches her head up to give you better access earning you the moan you have waited forever to hear.

Reaching for the hem of her shirt, you try to pull it off only to be stopped by Laura pulling it off first in less than a second. Her lips are back on yours and she may be crying but it’s clear she doesn’t want to stop. She pushes you back into the wall and you let her because you’ll take her any way you can get. She’s pulling on your shirt, desperately trying to get it off of you when she sobs into your mouth and you can’t do this.

“Laura, stop.”

“What? Don’t you want me?” she asks, looking as broken as ever.

“Of course I do, but not like this. What’s wrong? Did I do something?”

“No, it’s not you. Well, it is you but not like that,” she says. You start rubbing the soft skin on her back lightly urging her to continue. “I’m just so afraid.”

“Afraid of what?” you ask.

“I know now that you love me and I love you, but I’m afraid it won’t be enough. Why would someone like you ever love me enough to stay? You left me before and I’m just afraid that I’ll do something again to cause you to leave. I can’t lose you again, Carm. I just can’t.”

Your heart has never been so broken. You brush her hair back, run your hands down her arms and lace your fingers into hers.

“I know I left you, and I will never forgive myself for hurting you like that. Please understand that I never really intended to go anywhere and that’s why I came back. Although we spent our days fighting and I spent my nights trying to drink the pain away, you were always inevitable to me. I could never be apart from you for very long because you’re a part of me. You’ve filled the hole left in me by all the pain and anguish I went through in my life. If you really believe that there’s good in me it’s because you put it there.”

“Do you mean it?” she asks, trying to wipe her tears away.

“Yes, I mean it. There is not a force in the universe strong enough to take me away from you again. In life or in death I am forever yours, Laura.”

She tugs you back into her, kissing you just like the first time when she thought you were dead but nothing could ever take you from her, not even your supposed destruction. She’s pulling at your shirt again and you’re still not sure if you should.

“Laura, are you sure it’s the right time. I don’t want you to regret”

“I may regret a lot of things in my life, but I could never regret you. Please, Carm. I just need you,” she says and looks into you like she’s trying to find her way back from being lost. Her eyes are so sad and while you may be the cause of most of that, you’re determined to spend the rest of her life trying to make up for it no matter how long it takes.

You wrap your arms around her back and lay her down so gently. Brushing her hair off her shoulders, you lay down on top of her making quick work of kissing every bit of skin you can reach. You miss everything about her; the feeling of her skin that’s than anything you’ve ever felt, the way she actually smells and tastes as sweet as the cookies she eats and the way she moans and claws at you when she’s desperate for your touch. This is where you’re meant to be. All your three-hundred and thirty-five years on this planet have lead you to this beautiful woman. Your entire existence is about loving her and you’re going to prove it.

You’re kissing your way down her stomach, licking and sucking on the spots you know will drive her crazy when she grabs you by your hair and pulls you up. You’re kissing while you settle in between her legs and when you roll your hips into her, she moans into you and you need her now more than ever. You find her hands, entwining your fingers with hers as you grind into her. She wraps her legs around your back and she’s thrusting and moaning as if she’s already close. Under normal circumstances you would have pulled back, taking your time to draw this out into an all-night affair, but right now you want to give her everything she wants.

You let go with your right hand, moving it down in between you stopping just short of its intended destination. While it’s clear she wants you, your respect for her is more important than any hormones coursing through your bodies and you pull back looking for reassurance. She nods her head quickly so you dip your hand into her underwear, moaning at the feeling of how wet she is for you. She throws her head back so you begin to kiss and suck on her neck as your fingers go to work, aided only by your hips that continue to grind into her.

The two of you are working together, moving in unison to orchestrate the love song you have written in the stars. She’s close. You can feel it in the way she’s scratching her hands down your back and the way her legs are tightening around you. You can hear it in every breath and every moan. You want her to hold on for just a moment longer because you so desperately missed the sight of her wrecked and writhing underneath you but when you remember that she’s yours again you flick your fingers just the right way to send her over the edge screaming broken versions of your name as she bites down on your shoulder in a failed attempt to keep control.

Her chest is heaving against yours as you stretch back up to kiss her. Every moment is slow and deliberate as you try to remember what it is like to be without her. Although you spent all that time apart, it’s almost as if it never happened. You and Laura fit together like two puzzle pieces. Everything you’re missing she fills and more. You’re overflowing with her love when she’s with you and you can never go back to the emptiness you felt before her.

“Do you have any idea how much I love you? How long I’ve waited for you? How broken I was before you? How my life stopped when I thought I wasn’t enough for you?” you ask while pulling your hand free and finding hers.

“I think I know. I can feel it every time you kiss me. I love you too, Carm. So much that I gave up everything and I don’t care.”

You lean down and kiss her again, causing her to sigh and run her hands down your back. She pulls your shirt up and this time you help her pull it all the way off. She sits up and you make quick work of removing her bra. She pushes you backward slowly, crawling on top of you as she removes your bra too. You’re startled by the cold feeling of the concrete on your bare back but she quickly warms you up by laying her warm skin against yours.

You’ve never been one to let anyone else take control, you’re always the dominant one. But there’s something about Laura that you’ll willingly lay back and let her take you. The way her lips feel against your hips is unrivaled by any sensation you have ever known. Just knowing she’s so close to where you need her most sends a surge of heat through you that you haven’t felt since you were alive more than three-hundred years ago.

She kisses her way back up your body, stopping at your chest to swirl her tongue around your right nipple before she closes her mouth around it and sucks lightly while grinding her hips into you. You throw your head back so hard, you can hear your skull hit the floor.

“Oh god, Carm. Are you ok?” she asks, releasing her lips from you in a pop.

“I will be if you just keep doing what you’re doing. Please, Laura. Don’t stop.”

She crawls up your body, cradling your sore head in her hands as she kisses you again. You don’t know how long you’ll have Laura in your life but if every day can be spent kissing her like this then it might be enough. Maybe.

You reach for her pants, trying and failing to remove them. She sits up on her knees and your lips chase after her. You’re kissing your way across her chest and stomach as she wiggles her hips to take her pants off. You help her push them the rest of the way down before you bite down softly on her breast, causing her to let out a moan that you know for sure the mad scientist must have heard from the other room.

She pushes you back down and the look of desperation in her eyes is merely a precursor of what’s to come. She drops back down and you think she’s going to kiss you, but she bypasses your lips and goes for the spot below your ear. If your underwear weren’t already ruined they were now. She licks her way across your jaw before finally giving you the kiss you were looking for.

Your hands move from her lower back to her ass, grabbing it lightly and causing her to let out another gentle moan as she moves from your lips to your collar bone. She’s biting the skin there, hard enough for it to sting but quickly soothing it with her tongue before moving to another spot. You know exactly what she’s doing because you feel the need to do the same. We never had enough time to love each other the way we wanted because we were too busy with everything else. Too busy fighting the evil we never had a chance to defeat to have the love we deserve.

She licks her way down your body and you’re shattered and trembling in anticipation. You have never wanted her more than you do right now and just knowing that you can finally have her again is enough to make you combust. She wastes no more time in ridding you of the final barrier that keeps the two of you apart. She throws your pants behind her as she pulls your knees up and apart, settling herself comfortably between them. Your body is raging, just knowing what she’s about to do but she stops just short of the finish line.

You look down to see if she’s ok when you see her smiling up at you. She grabs onto your hips to steady herself before saying “I love you” and dragging her tongue from your entrance to your clit. Your hips fly up off the floor, body twitching from the sheer pleasure she’s making you feel. Her surprisingly strong hands push you back down as she goes back in. You would usually be embarrassed by how wet she made you before even touching you, but she’s clearly enjoying it and that honestly makes this so much better. Licking and sucking on your clit is making you close much faster than you’re used to, but if you’re honest, Laura just has that effect on you. In all your years, no one has ever been able to unravel you the way Laura can. You’ve never been with someone that loves you the way she does and nothing will ever compare.

You’re close and she knows it. Speeding up the work her tongue is doing on your clit, her fingers tease your entrance as if she’s asking permission. By this point your hips have a mind of their own, rolling and bucking into her while she tries to tame them back down.

“Laura, p…please. Yes.”

That’s all she needed to hear. She pushes two fingers into you with ease, causing you to cry out and grab onto her hair. She doesn’t stop, no matter how hard you pull. Her fingers are speeding up, curling up and into the spot she knows will drive you into oblivion as her tongue never lets up. It takes only a few more second of this before you come into her mouth, screaming her name like it’s the last word you ever want to speak. She keeps up what she’s doing until your body stops convulsing and the grip you have around her fingers lets up.

You sit up, just as she’s removing her fingers and pull her into a kiss better than all the rest. The taste of yourself on Laura’s tongue is better than you remember and suddenly you want her again but that can wait. You pull her back onto your lap and as close to you as you can, hugging her tightly as she tries to steady her breathing.

You pull back slightly, just enough to look into her beautiful, golden eyes. The faint smile she’s wearing is by far the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen and you know in that moment that she’s it. She’s the one for you. No matter what happens when you find your way out of this library, no matter what your mother is planning, you will never stop fighting for her.

“I love you too, cupcake. Just promise me one thing?” you ask.

“Anything,” she says as she wraps her arms lightly around your neck and leans her forehead against yours.

“Just keep loving me. Everything will be ok if you just keep loving me.”

“As if I could ever stop.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, there it is folks. I'm having a hard time with the silence about the future of Carmilla and the hiatus in general so expect a lot more gross fluff and smut from me. Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed it! Don't be a stranger because I love hearing from every single one of you. You can literally comment on ever chapter of every fic I write and I will still be giddy reading every one of them. Love always, Monica.


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